


Breakdown

by randomfandomimagine



Series: Scenarios (Reader Insert) [11]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Drinking, Mental Breakdown, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-10-23 09:53:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17681216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomfandomimagine/pseuds/randomfandomimagine
Summary: Requested by anon:Here ya go love! For Connor from DBH: maybe something a little angst where the reader is normally very collected, strong, takes hard cases, but one day after a nasty case she has a breakdown and storms out of the office. Connor goes to her apartment to check on her and finds her trying to drown her guilt and anxiety in alcohol. Of course he has a massive crush on the reader and is there to pick up the pieces.





	Breakdown

You plopped down in your chair, drained from all your energies after such a difficult and emotionally challenging case. Connor’s persistence and determination, although usually good things, didn’t help this time either.

Before, you had wished Hank would ‘lend’ you the android so you could spend some more time with him. But now that you were helping them with the deviant cases, you weren’t as excited anymore. Sometimes Connor behaved too much like a machine even though you were positive that he was more like a deviant than he himself realized. He cared about Hank and about you, he demonstrated empathy and fondness, he almost behaved like a human. But not that day.

Watching him arriving to your desk, you sighed and put a hand to your face, exhausted. You knew him well enough to realize what he was about to say and you didn’t want to hear it.

“Detective” Connor called you gravely, not taking the hint when you didn’t look up at him, and instead continued speaking. “We-“

“Not now, Connor” You warned him, really not having the strength to put up with it.

You felt anxious and nervous still, you felt your hands shaking a little. After the frantic chase and the way Connor got shot, not to mention how the deviant killed himself, you were very affected by it all. Even if Connor assured the bullet didn’t reach any biocomponents and he seemed unaffected himself. More than anything, he was frustrated that another deviant fled.

“Detective” He tried again, this time sternly. “We let it get away”

“No” You finally looked up, feeling how the apathy you felt shifted into a sudden anger. “We didn’t let him get away. We chased him to apprehend it, and he jumped off a fucking rooftop”

Connor frowned as his LED buffered yellow, and he tilted his head as though he was trying to read you. Didn’t he understand why you were so upset?

You felt empathy towards those androids, and that one killed himself just like that. He preferred dying to being held captive. He chose to die rather to betray his people. It was heartbreaking! They deserved to be free! You couldn’t do that anymore, not when you fought against people who just wanted to be free.

“I agree that it was unfortunate, I should have predicted it would do such a thing” That had to be an attempt to comfort you, but for the wrong reason. “But we must continue our investigation, maybe some other case-“

“You think I’m frustrated because this case led to nowhere?” You stood up, fueled by that anger as it grew more intense. “You think I give a crap about the investigation anymore?”

“You seem upset, Detective” He blinked, holding your stare as you positioned yourself closer to him. “Why else would it be?”

You supposed you judged him wrong. Maybe Connor didn’t feel, maybe all those ‘emotions’ he felt were part of his programming to ‘work harmoniously with humans’, to fit in. That broke your heart even more.

“You just don’t understand, Connor” You sighed once more, feeling at the verge of crying out of pure frustration, but also sadness and exhaustion.

“This isn’t like you, Detective” The fact that he was calling you that just angered you more, he could never see past the investigation even to call you by your name. “What’s the matter? Please, explain it to me, I would like to know”

He wouldn’t understand what you were feeling even if you explained it to him, so when you felt like a few tears escaped your eyes, you pushed him away and tried to run away. But Connor held you by the arm.

“Are you alright?”

“No, I’m not alright, Connor! Don’t you feel even a little bit sad about those androids? I thought you were different, you were always so thoughtful and sweet towards me… But you’re just a machine, you didn’t mean any of that, you were just following orders”

“Y/N…”

“Forget it, it’s too late now! You can’t feel empathy, not for me, not for those deviants!”

“Wait!”

You angrily tore away from his grip and left the police station, furiously wiping your tears.

*

Connor knocked on the door, not knowing what to expect from you when you opened the door. If you opened the door, that was, he knew you were mad at him. But he was more concerned than anything.

No matter how small the possibilities were in his analysis, Connor couldn’t stop considering the terrible scenarios that might have happened to you. You were always so calm and collected, so strong even through the hardest cases, he had never witnessed you having such a breakdown. For that very reason, Connor was afraid of what might have happened to you after you left the police station.

“Y/N?” He tried cautiously. “It’s me, Connor!”

“Go away!” Came your voice from inside the house, even though it sounded slightly slurred. “Leave me the fuck alone!”

Connor frowned, taking notice of various worrisome things. First of all, the slurring in your speech led him to believe you had been drinking. Second of all, you never swore, even though you had been spending a lot of time with Lieutenant Anderson. And thirdly, he still had never seen you in such an angry and affected state, nor isolating yourself.

“I just want to know you’re okay” Connor spoke, loud and clear, so you could hear him through the door. “I’m sorry about what I said before, I want to-“

He cut himself off when he heard the sound of sobbing. Connor then experienced a great sadness, with such intensity that he didn’t know what to do, he wanted to get rid of that suffocating feeling. He had to do something to comfort you.

“I don’t wanna talk…” You feebly told him.

“That’s alright, you don’t have to. I won’t talk either if you don’t want me to, but please let me in, I’m…” He didn’t want to say it, to show his vulnerability and hence the instability in his programming, but Connor knew your wellbeing and safety came first. “I’m worried about you”

He paused, letting his words sink in, hoping you understood what he meant. That he wasn’t serious in the police station, that he wasn’t a machine. That he felt, and especially felt for you. That he was indeed worried about you, that he had come all the way to your place for you and not for the case.

Connor took a step back in surprise when the front door swung open and you threw yourself at him, hugging him tight. Not without a little awkward hesitance, he put his hands on your back to comfort you. His arms gently tightened around you when he noticed you had buried your face in his shoulder and were bawling your eyes out.

“It’s alright, Y/N” He whispered, patting your back. “Please don’t cry”

You didn’t say anything, just held on to him, clinging to his jacket as your other arm feebly hung over his shoulder, the bottle you were holding resting against his back.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Connor tried, hoping it would help you.

“I-I don’t know!” You sobbed, your voice being muffled against his jacket. “I don’t even know what got into me, I just couldn’t take it anymore!”

Connor patiently let you calm down, noticing how your shoulders slowly relaxed as the sobs subsided. And let you talk too, knowing you needed to vent and let out all the emotions that stirred inside you.

“It’s just… The world is a place bad enough on its own, but we are terrible to each other and that makes it worse…” You slowly distanced yourself from Connor, a little embarrassed because of your breakdown. “Deviants aren’t evil, they’re just different! But they are alive!”

“Is that why you were so upset?”

“I guess… Maybe I had been bottling all these emotions until they piled up on me and I broke down… I don’t know, I’m just… tired”

Connor decided to take charge for your sake, to keep you safe for your own good. Even if it meant upsetting you a little again.

“I didn’t mean what I said in the police station” He assured, trying to distract you as he took the bottle from your hand so you couldn’t drink any more of the alcohol, then he put it in a nearby table. “I thought it would be best to focus on the investigation and ignore my… feelings. But not when it hurts you, Y/N”

“Why do you care so much about me, then?” You answered, looking up at him with hazy and puffy eyes.

“I don’t know…” He knew why, he had analyzed himself to try and understand those particular instabilities triggered by your presence. And he had found an answer, a human emotion called adoration, or how some called it, a ‘crush’. Not that he was willing to confess it to you just yet. “All I know is I don’t like seeing you in this state and I’d do anything to stop it”

“Oh, Connor…” You were an emotional drunk, and also a sad one.

He observed you as you wobbled, barely having the strength to stand on your own, using his tall stature to support yourself. Noticing this, he securely wrapped his arms around your waist.

“I will look after you, Y/N” He promised, helping you walk and taking you to your room.

You felt better already having him with you, especially knowing he cared so much.


End file.
